Had a call from Olenju earlier on. It was just a very simple and short conversation but I don't know why, it left a funny feeling in me. Even till now.
The phone call just reminded me of the olden days, when I was just starting out, how Ms Olen spent so much effort and time on me. Our conversations over the phone can be at least an hour long man...just rattling off what happened during the day or about shows, or sometimes sharing of God's word,answering of the questions that I have. Ahh. Its been quite some time since I question about God's word already. Don't know if it because I have reach the point where most of my learning is only from Cg and Svc's message and during normal BS. Or have I already stop wondering and questioning about this and that to find out more. Hmm. Also, I find myself less about to communicate with people, even those I trust or am close to, what I'm really thinking or feeling. Sigh. My wall is high up again... =/
Anyway, after that I found Jess' blog and I'm really so troubled about what I read, of the stuff she is going through. I don't have a clear picture at all. Aiyz, but I really wanna befriend her! and even best, reach out to her, even though she does belong to a church, but I feel she is buay zhai leh =/ but how how how, we don't even know each other personally or even a common ground to start of to be friend. Randomly walk up to her and say, "Hi, can we be friend?" I think she will freak out man. Lol
Anyway, the point here is that her blog is playing out random Christian songs and it just felt so nice randomly listening to them. I cant find any list of songs or the source on her blog so can't see the name of the songs being played at all. But its really nice lar. Maybe that because I've not been listening to any P&W on my own basis for very long too =/
Somehow tonight, I just feel that something that has been missing seems to be coming back... and I really wanna get back to my first love for Daddy. I've been trying to get back for quite a long while but to not much avail hur... =/
School was weird. We had a 6 hours break and I killed it by having Mac breakfast,playing of hours of arcade and lunch again after that with classmates at TM before lesson, but I don't feel the true joy at all. I mean it was fun but not the fullest kind that I really enjoyed =/ so weird. By right I shouldn't be feeling like that since eating,playing and slacking are suppose to be my fav. pastimes...
After that was my Badminton trail and I didn't pass it. Was very disappointed and I really wanted to cry on the way back...and I really found it weird because before the trail I was very sure that even if I didn't get in, I'm okay cause I didn't really desire this a lot. But the thing is, during the trail, I was sparing with SN, and there and there on the spot I had to decide if I should 'kill' her or just fang sui cause after all, we're classmate. In the end, I chose the latter but despite doing so, she is so nervous and not up to it and kept missing the shuttles. And on my side, because I 'fang sui' I didn't get selected also. If I really played, I think my chances of getting in should be there. Sigh. But I figure out that I'm upset because I didn't give my best and not because of my friend or for not getting selected or what. I really want thank my Father for making me realise my problem and also giving me a bigger heart, because at the end of the day, I am able to admit that it's my decision and I should not shift any blame and I was able to encourage SN also. Something that I rarely do for new friend.
Wanz, you really need to set yourself focus and decide that what issit that you really want and go for it. Do not hold back, do not be flicker minded or soft-hearted when you really need to seize the opportunity!
Basketball, Netball and Dragon boating trails coming up! Roars!
The phone call just reminded me of the olden days, when I was just starting out, how Ms Olen spent so much effort and time on me. Our conversations over the phone can be at least an hour long man...just rattling off what happened during the day or about shows, or sometimes sharing of God's word,answering of the questions that I have. Ahh. Its been quite some time since I question about God's word already. Don't know if it because I have reach the point where most of my learning is only from Cg and Svc's message and during normal BS. Or have I already stop wondering and questioning about this and that to find out more. Hmm. Also, I find myself less about to communicate with people, even those I trust or am close to, what I'm really thinking or feeling. Sigh. My wall is high up again... =/
Anyway, after that I found Jess' blog and I'm really so troubled about what I read, of the stuff she is going through. I don't have a clear picture at all. Aiyz, but I really wanna befriend her! and even best, reach out to her, even though she does belong to a church, but I feel she is buay zhai leh =/ but how how how, we don't even know each other personally or even a common ground to start of to be friend. Randomly walk up to her and say, "Hi, can we be friend?" I think she will freak out man. Lol
Anyway, the point here is that her blog is playing out random Christian songs and it just felt so nice randomly listening to them. I cant find any list of songs or the source on her blog so can't see the name of the songs being played at all. But its really nice lar. Maybe that because I've not been listening to any P&W on my own basis for very long too =/
Somehow tonight, I just feel that something that has been missing seems to be coming back... and I really wanna get back to my first love for Daddy. I've been trying to get back for quite a long while but to not much avail hur... =/
School was weird. We had a 6 hours break and I killed it by having Mac breakfast,playing of hours of arcade and lunch again after that with classmates at TM before lesson, but I don't feel the true joy at all. I mean it was fun but not the fullest kind that I really enjoyed =/ so weird. By right I shouldn't be feeling like that since eating,playing and slacking are suppose to be my fav. pastimes...
After that was my Badminton trail and I didn't pass it. Was very disappointed and I really wanted to cry on the way back...and I really found it weird because before the trail I was very sure that even if I didn't get in, I'm okay cause I didn't really desire this a lot. But the thing is, during the trail, I was sparing with SN, and there and there on the spot I had to decide if I should 'kill' her or just fang sui cause after all, we're classmate. In the end, I chose the latter but despite doing so, she is so nervous and not up to it and kept missing the shuttles. And on my side, because I 'fang sui' I didn't get selected also. If I really played, I think my chances of getting in should be there. Sigh. But I figure out that I'm upset because I didn't give my best and not because of my friend or for not getting selected or what. I really want thank my Father for making me realise my problem and also giving me a bigger heart, because at the end of the day, I am able to admit that it's my decision and I should not shift any blame and I was able to encourage SN also. Something that I rarely do for new friend.
Wanz, you really need to set yourself focus and decide that what issit that you really want and go for it. Do not hold back, do not be flicker minded or soft-hearted when you really need to seize the opportunity!
Basketball, Netball and Dragon boating trails coming up! Roars!
Labels: Heart matters, School
†-Wanz- actioned & cut at 1:28 am
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home